I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
