I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Redeem this text for a blowjob
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
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