If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
