That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
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