i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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