can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
