I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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