you win again, gameday.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.