problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
We just shotgunned beers for America
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am