margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
sarcasm needs its own font
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize