if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
