1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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