What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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