Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
