WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
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