i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
