I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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