ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Randomize
