i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize