How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
