C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Randomize
