I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
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We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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