I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Why are your pants in the freezer?
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
