So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize