I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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