Moan for me like Helen Keller
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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