I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
