Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize
