Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
