Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
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