dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
i just google imaged poop.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
