I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
