glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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