went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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