My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize