I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize