Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
ugly people sure do ruin things
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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