handjob tips. give me some.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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