So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Randomize
