the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Let's paint friendship bongs
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Randomize
