So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
