we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
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