you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize
