i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize