I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
