he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
so much tequila, so little girl.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
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