I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Randomize
