Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I've blown a few things in my day
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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