I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
His nipple licking is glorious
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