Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
