So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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